Raise Children to Be Good Sports

We raise children to be good sports by teaching them how to be good sports. In this world of competitive sports, it’s important to raise children who also know what it means to be a good sport. Winning isn’t everything. Playing sports is a positive influence as long as it teaches the how-to of the selected activity plus the sportsmanship needed to handle either victory or defeat.

Victory is easy because smiles and excitement typically follow a win. But a good sport also thanks the other team for coming out to play. They would even go out to shake hands and extend words of appreciation for a game well played.

Defeat is another story. The emotions are very different. Defeat can cause a youngster to be downcast and feel he/she isn’t good enough and maybe never will be. It can also bring on tears and angry outbursts when the win doesn’t happen. What will it take to deescalate these frustrating moments? To begin with, a heart of empathy.

There’s nothing more unsettling than seeing a parent or coach scream at the players from the sidelines.

Both coach and parents play vital roles. Their examples set the tone. If either yells a lot, the child learns performance is the most important factor. If the coach or parent is supportive in teaching basics and can tame frustrations in calming ways, big lessons about building character begin to take shape. Coping skills are being taught and in turn caught by the child. Teaching boys and girls the attributes of teamwork creates an atmosphere of camaraderie. It’s a team win or a team loss that happens. Children learn to be happy for the opponent, too,—and empathetic.

Ask yourself what can I do to help my boy or girl become more proficient at this sport? This might require time, rescheduling, and maybe money, too.

Failure is harder to cope with but all of us fail sometimes. And all of us have moments of winning, too. Comparing one child to another is always a bad idea. Instead, be honest. As a parent, it’s good to share a time when you didn’t win. How did you feel? What did you do? Your child will be more accepting of his or her own losses if they hear it isn’t so unusual.

It’s highly unlikely that anyone will win every time we go out to swing the bat, kick the ball, enter the swim meet, or compete on a chess board. Whatever the activity, it’s important to teach life lessons that really matter. Concepts of good sportsmanship develop character. Those lessons will last a lifetime. They impact how the child will react as an adult. How to treat future co-workers, spouses, children, and friends.

Raising children to be good sports matters for today and tomorrow.

Explain it in terms of the golden rule. Tell your child, “Sportsmanship is about treating other people in a game the way you want to be treated.” Kids should be praised for their effort, hard work, commitment, and passion, not for their performance or their victories. This will teach your child that they do not always have to win to be strong or successful.”