The miles we’ve individually traveled have shaped and developed our identities. 

What’s your story?

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The experiences we walk through in life mold who we are in big ways. For instance, growing up in a family of four children, both parents, and one set of grandparents on the same property shaped my concept of who I am. Core values were laid down. I was the middle child. Often that didn’t feel special. But we helped our neighbors, played board games, caught the value of sharing, and learned to appreciate music. Money was in short supply, so hand-me-downs were welcomed. My grandfather’s death, when I was fourteen, was something I didn’t know how to deal with. Two years later, my parents divorce severed our family. I moved 700 miles away to be with my mother while my siblings stayed with our dad. A year later, I married for the first time.

How we process those miles matters

All of us have coping mechanisms that come into play when life lets us down. For those who know Jesus as their Savior, there’s a positive influence to fall back on. Understanding the love of God lessens the sting when human love betrays or doesn’t meet our expectations. Yes, the sting of betrayal still hurts, but we are not without hope.

For those with a flawed perspective of who they are because of life’s hurts, there can be many obstacles to overcome. Some quickly resort to outbursts of anger, seek revenge, or choose an addictive behavior in an attempt to quiet their inner pain. Others might choose to walk away from relationships, stuff feelings, and possibly denounce God, while some become workaholics. These strategies are almost certain to backfire, leaving plenty of emotional carnage behind.

Don’t fall into the trap

The only way not to be trapped by our circumstances is to know who God says we are, and dismiss those who have labeled us otherwise. God says we are the apple of His eye. That’s a really big deal. You are not a mistake or afterthought. You were purposely created in God’s image to walk the earth at this very time. Begin to live that identity. Never forget that as believers, we are loved, forgiven, recipients of holy grace, and even co-heirs with Christ! Own who you are!

Use those miles traveled as stepping stones

Did you know God wants us to put our miles of experiences to good use? He desires that we help others find Kingdom blessings, too. Because of my “miles” I am now a voice proclaiming hope to step families. Prior to becoming a blended family, the divorced-remarried families would have been hard for me to relate to. These homes are fragile family units. Because we needed help, and God brought answers, I was made ready to help others with similar struggles. See life’s valleys as fertile soil for growth. I learned to lean on His faithfulness. And He never let me down.

Ephesians 3:18-19 …may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.